PHOTO BY SEAN COLLIER

It shocks me that this column is necessary.

I figured out about a decade ago that you cannot actually throw away a television — certainly not in the city of Pittsburgh, where the curbside disposal of items such as television, computers and most other electronic devices has been banned since 2010. I would’ve figured that 14-plus years was enough time for most city residents to catch on.

Yet I regularly walk by a television on the curb, placed there in the hopes that the sanitation folks will make an exception and break the law just because they like the looks of someone’s curb. Any futilely discarded TV I pass inevitably suffers one of two fates: Either the owner sheepishly takes it back inside, or it sits to gather rainwater and dirt for weeks on end.

Leaving TVs out was banned for a pretty good reason: Televisions contain harmful substances including lead, mercury — even small quantities of arsenic, in some cases. All of these are harmless if contained inside a television. You do not, however, want them leaking out underfoot and into your yard. Or, for that matter, thousands of devices leaking into a landfill — with the potential to poison soil or water supplies, which is why the law was passed in the first place.

No, if you absolutely must get rid of a television, you need to take it to an electronics recycling place. The city contracts this work to the Pennsylvania Resources Council; you register for a drop-off, bring them your stuff and they’ll take it for about 35 cents per pound. (Private companies will do the same thing without pre-registration; they just might cost a bit more. I’ve taken televisions to Evolution E-Cycling in the South Side, and it’s an easy process.)

Yes. You need to pay to get rid of a television. That’s frequently the sticking point for many people, who cannot conceive of paying to no longer own something. It can be frustrating if this is your first time confronting this cost. But here’s the thing: Televisions have become very, very cheap. Even higher-end televisions now cost a tiny fraction of what they used to — and the farther back you go, the more TVs used to cost (adjusted for inflation, obviously). Today, it’s not unusual to get a gigantic, mid-range TV for around $500, especially if you wait around for sales.

We’re getting TVs for cheap. There’s no reason to grumble about another $20 on the back end to get rid of it.

If you need no other motivation to keep your TVs off the curb, look: It’s not going to work. Sanitation workers won’t take them. (And they’ll notice if you do something stupid like trying to wrap a TV in garbage bags.) So you’re probably going to just drag it back into the house, put it in a closet and figure it out later.

Which brings up another good point: Just do that in the first place. Surely there’s some closet, crawl space or attic in your house where you can shove a completely flat appliance. Don’t want to pay to get rid of it? Just hide it somewhere. Out of sight, out of mind.

And renters: While I’m not telling you to conveniently “forget” that you left a TV tucked into a corner of the attic when you move out, thus making it the landlord’s problem … well, I’m not telling you not to do that, either.

I’m kidding. But if I weren’t, it would be pretty easy to pull off.